“It can’t be done” Full stop. How many times have you heard this statement? It is potentially the most disempowering set of words that anyone could utter worsened only by “I can’t do it” which is self-defeating. This is a mindset that can be changed with practice. Try redeeming these terrible phrases with the words “but”. For example:
“It can’t be done but………we could do it another way”
“It can’t be done but……..we have a better alternative”
I’ve often heard managers say that when confronted with this statement from staff, they respond with “why?” to try and encourage problem solving but what this actually does is places the other person in a defensive mode and they feel compelled to justify their position and prove “why” it can’t be done. So, this actually has the opposite outcome and should be avoided.
Completely ban “It can’t be done” and “I can’t do it” from your vocabulary unless it’s followed by “but”. Ban it from your presence. Encourage your staff, your children, your partner to add “but” in a constructive way if they absolutely must use that statement and experience the change that comes from it.